REALITY CHECK

I'm not sure if it was June Cleaver of Leave it to Beaver or Margaret Anderson of Father Knows Best. All I know is that these 1950's sitcom moms impressed me with their housekeeping skills. Not only were their homes clutter-free, but these gals vacuumed in crisply ironed dresses and high heels! Total reality back then. Not.

Fortunately, my mom didn't set that kind of example. I would have terrible conflict now with my own housekeeping habits, and probably with my female identity, had my mother been June or Margaret in the flesh. Instead, my mom who is now eighty-seven, is a realist. "Life has its challenges," she'd say, "but you just pick yourself up by the bootstraps and go on."

I remember when my mom announced that she was not ever going to call herself a senior citizen. "People look at you differently, and I don't feel any different!" She was emphatic. "I don't care if I don't get the discounts!"

Her words that day have always stayed with me. People's perception of what is old divides the young and the more mature populations. It's as if an invisible line divides the two, and the younger folks (including those older ones in denial) will not cross that line without a fight. Baby boomers - that's me, too - are the toughest fighters.

So what are we afraid of? Why is crossing that threshold so scary? In talking to other boomers like myself, I hear that "old" equates to loss - loss of a youth and all of its possibility, loss of a professional identity, loss of time. But most significant of all is the fear of losing one's independence - not being able to do what you want to do because your health and/or mobility have become impaired.

I can hear some of you murmuring back to me, "Old is as old does," or "Old is a state of mind." I would be the first to agree that attitude is paramount, especially as it applies to being proactive with exercise and lifestyle choices. But the reality is that some health conditions may be out of our control. The wisdom of knowing what you can do about what you CAN control is the difference between feeling fear or fearlessness as we age.

My mother, orphaned at age eight during the Depression, is a survivor because life-imperfect was better than no life at all. "Take a walk when life gets you down," she used to say. "Be glad you can walk. Now walk! You'll feel better." And that is what I did.

I am still walking because I know I can. My clients are moving their bodies because they know they can. If fear of potential losses in older age grips you at times, then refocus on what you CAN do now. Chances are you can keep those assets if you commit to strengthening them, mobilizing them, and taking ownership of them. You have an investment in YOU.

Reality isn't the 1950's sitcoms (though I did love watching them) or any other airbrushed image of what life is supposed to be like. Aging is a reality, but fear doesn't have to be the pre-requisite. Assess your strengths and limitations, focus on what you can do to stay healthy, and for goodness sakes, get up and walk!

THE WALKING PRESCRIPTION:

...One step at a time, one foot in front of the other, shoulder blades back, tummy in and looking forward...

FREQUENCY - whenever possible (aim for a minimum of three times a week)

DURATION - as long as your body lets you (20 - 30 minutes is ideal)

INTENSITY - be sure to keep breathing (you should be able to hold a conversation, albeit labored)