COMPUTER POTATO SYNDROME

My lifestyle these past four weeks has changed dramatically. As I recover from major surgery, spud roots are on the verge of sprouting from my behind as I transform from a personal trainer to an impersonal potato. No matter how necessary this hiatus from my usual fitness walking and weight-training is, I'm not liking it one bit.

Now, my chosen location for vegetating has not been the couch - a common place for potatoes to sprout. Rather, I have taken up long term residence on an office chair in front of my computer. My schedule prior to surgery usually prevented me from sitting endlessly at the entrance to the virtual world. Wow - am I making up for lost time. Already, my spud-butt has permanent ridges in it like a Ripples potato chip. Way too many hours sitting, I think. With a few more weeks of healing to go, I fear that potato paralysis will be next.

This is what I've learned, though. I didn't discover this on any of the millions of websites I've recently visited, either. The human body was never meant to sit for such long periods of time! This is a phenomenon of the technological age, and it's punishing on the muscles and joints. In Nomadic times, our ancestors used their bodies and muscles daily for hunting and gathering. During the agricultural revolution, they were busy tilling, planting and harvesting the land. I'm merely tilling the virtual landscape, planting web addresses, and then harvesting the information. The only revolution I'm witnessing is my body's protest against my fixed position and sedentary activity.

Those of you who navigate desks for a living are saying, "Welcome to my world." I know. I train many of you. And you know that I know that I never truly understood your plight until now. Those stiff neck and shoulder muscles, back pain, tight joints, poor circulation and tension headaches - I FEEL your pain now. Even my gut in its post-operative state wants to follow the compressed curve of my lower back and splay across my thighs like a pillowy lap desk.

Temporary or long term, this kind of work requires relief from the discomfort, and then the prevention of the associated physical problems before they start. Management of both of these issues is possible with stretching.

Stretching is simple, gentle, requires no special equipment or skills, and it can be done anywhere, anytime. The stretches I'm going to recommend are just a few of the many that can be effective. I've selected one each for the shoulders and neck, the back, and the legs. As you perform the stretches, remember to breathe easily, focus on the muscles and joints being stretched, and be guided by how the stretch feels. You want to stretch until you meet that wall of tension, and then hold it there - don't bounce - for 15-30 seconds. Never push a stretch to the point of pain - stay within the limits of what your body will comfortably allow. When possible, try to walk around at least once an hour. Get your blood circulating and move your extremities.

NECK AND SHOULDER STRETCH - Stand with your arms behind you and grasp your left wrist with your right hand. Pull your left arm gently toward your right hip. As you hold your arm in this position, turn your head to your right. You should feel the stretch down the left side of your neck and shoulder. Hold 15-30 seconds. Repeat using the opposite arm.

BACK STRETCH - Sitting in your chair with knees bent and feet on the floor, separate your legs about shoulder distance apart. Slowly walk your hands down your legs stopping as close to your ankles as you can. Hold your ankles, keeping your back rounded and head in line with your spine for 15-30 seconds. You should feel this stretch in the lower and mid-back. Slowly walk your hands back up your legs.

HAMSTRING STRETCH - Sitting close to the front edge of your chair, extend one straight leg forward with your heel on the floor. The stationary leg should remain bent with the foot on the floor. Place your hands at mid-thigh of the extended leg. With your back straight, extend forward hinging at the hips. At the same time, flex the foot of the extended leg, pulling your toes back toward you. Hold for 15-30 seconds. You should feel this stretch along the back of your leg. Now switch to the other leg.

During the last two decades, repetitive strain injuries of the wrists, hands and arms have risen by 80%, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. Such injuries, including carpal tunnel syndrome and tendinitis, are now the single largest category of workplace-related injuries (1997, Bob Anderson). Spud-butt syndrome has to be a close second. So, whatever your reasons for sitting at a desk or computer for extended periods of time, be sure to take breaks and stretch. As for me, I am so ready to use my muscles a bit more like my ancestors. There wasn't a spud-butt among them, I'm sure.